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She’s so hot, man

Just checking in.

To my non-existent reader group – Hello, you little cunts

To myself, a note: never trust a good pirate. There’s a reason he’s good. [Context: nearly got beheaded, got away by the skin of my teeth and a broken jaw]

In today’s other news, I’ve managed to quite seriously offend three people on twitter on via my expendable accounts, and I offended a couple of humans in the real world via my lifetime account with an expiry date. People call me a sadistic prick all the time and I reciprocate by being one. Some kind of syndrome in action, no doubt.

A little birdie once told me, go fuck yourself, and there was no way to do it but I have the utmost respect for nature, so I wanked off to myself. Then I watched Predestination and did it again. Wonder why they couldn’t call it Precum or something like that. PR issues, probably.

I really want the John Wick sequel to be good; the reviews so far are good. The first one, I recall, did not air in theatres here; half the time, Indians don’t know a good movie when they see one [yes, you know it]. No wonder Dev Patel [among others] gave Bollywood the finger and Priyanka Chopra [among others] is so keen to have Hollywood’s finger in her. Who’s to say she hasn’t already?

In any case, this was just a test post. Joke’s on you.

😦

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